Busy male seeks
subservient wife strictly for household chores, cleaning, cooking, washing and all the things I’m supposed to do.
Romantic chores may be included if my current wife sees this ad.
I spotted this ad this morning in the Moreland Leader personals section(page 28,March 8, 2010) and immediately thought that it was worthy of a few words.
Who is this guy with a sense of humour and what exactly is he looking for?
Does he want a cleaning lady with a little something else?
Is he willing to pay?
I can imagine the scenario whereby he meets the respondent to the ad at some suburban coffee shop during his lunch break and starts the interview process.
Choremaster: Ah hello. You must Kylie. Nice to meet you, I’m Jason. Would you like a coffee?
Chorist: Why thank you Jason, I’d love a latte.
Choremaster: Good, here’s $10 and I’ll have a machiatto while you’re at it.
Chorist: Excuse me! I’m not your slave!
Choremaster: Not yet but that is the position you are applying for is it not?
Chorist: Well I suppose you’re right there, I’ll be back in a minute.
A few minutes pass and Kylie arrives back with a plastic flag with the number 16 printed on it.
Choremaster: Now, let’s get to the point. The position involves all the duties of a wife with none of the benefits. And it is unpaid too. Your only recompense will be the satisfaction that you your self will derive from seeing your reflection in the shine that you put on my varnished floors.
However, should my long suffering wife become suspicious of our arrangement and leave me, you shall be elevated to her vacated position and shall have to continue on her affair with the hairy bikers from next door as well as retaining your cleaning duties until such a time as I see fit to re-advertise your position.
Do I make myself cleer?
A waitress arrives with the two coffees and a knowing smile.
Chorist: Crystal clear master. When do I start?
Choremaster: Right now. I take 2 sugars if you don’t mind and give it a good stir while you’re at it.